We are on holiday in the Lake District for the first time since we moved away more than seven years ago. It has given us the opportunity to visit a friend, who has a gift of healing, who I met fifteen years ago when she was one of the speakers at a day's teach-in on Contemplative Prayer/ Christian Meditation. But more of her on a future blog.
Today after our earlier appointment, we made use of the longer day and having decided to walk up Muncaster Fell, we ordered packed lunches at the guest house in which we are staying.
The weather was glorious; the sun was out and there was a cloudless blue sky with a haze in the distance and it was difficult to realise that it was still March.
The first part of our walk was up a long straight bridle path, where we saw a buzzard and then a goshawk (or was it a Marsh Harrier?) flying quite low. The path then curved around a tarn where we stopped to take on extra fuel; a flapjack for me and a sandwich for him. As we sat just a foot away from the edge of the tarn we noticed frogs under the water, sunbathing on the bottom. At the far side were mallards with their brilliant green iridescent heads and although it looked peaceful the silence was broken by geese which made such a racket; we assumed there was some squabbling among the males as to which was going to get the female!
We continued on our walk to the trig point where we tried to name the tops of all the fells to our right while noticing Sellafield on the shoreline to our left!
We found a sheltered spot to eat the remainder of our lunches and enjoyed a musical entertainment from a skylark - beautiful!
We then treked on a little further as he wanted to see a Victorian table that he had read about. It looks like something from Stonehenge but was built for some Gentleman's picnic! It was difficult getting there as we could see no footpath and then we were confronted by a bog, which we crossed by stepping onto the Grandma Giles shaped tufts of dried grass, and taking a different path back we had to cross a narrower but deeper bog by leaping from stone to stone - great fun and our feet were still dry when we got back.
Thursday, 24 March 2011
Friday, 11 March 2011
women in leadership
For many years I was a member of 'Men Women and God'(MWG); the British equivalent of 'Christians for Biblical Equality', and so was aware of the many books written on the 'difficult' passages in the Bible. I attended some good MWG conferences with excellent speakers including I. Howard Marshall and was on their planning committee until my call to minister here in Wales.
So I was interested to read a recommendation on a friend's blog of, 'How I changed my mind about Women in Leadership - Compelling Stories from Prominent Evangelicals', where I. Howard Marshall is one of the twenty-one contributors.
And then on Wednesday morning there was an excellent interview on radio 4's Today with one of the clergy who is in the process during Lent to 'walk' from the Anglican Church to the Catholic Church because he believes that women should not become bishops. The interviewer, who I think was Justin Webb, questioned the Vicar as to whether what he was doing was right as Jesus preached love (or words to that effect) and I cheered from the shower!
Of the personal stories I have read so far in the book, many contributors came to a point in their lives where they realised that they had to go to scripture to see what it actually said rather than listening to what others said about the role of women! Whereas, I. Howard Marshall said; "my experience of working with godly women in ministry, teaching, and leadership has been ample confirmation that to exclude them from these roles is indefensible". Women need men like I. Howard Marshall so that we can become the people God called us to be!
So I was interested to read a recommendation on a friend's blog of, 'How I changed my mind about Women in Leadership - Compelling Stories from Prominent Evangelicals', where I. Howard Marshall is one of the twenty-one contributors.
And then on Wednesday morning there was an excellent interview on radio 4's Today with one of the clergy who is in the process during Lent to 'walk' from the Anglican Church to the Catholic Church because he believes that women should not become bishops. The interviewer, who I think was Justin Webb, questioned the Vicar as to whether what he was doing was right as Jesus preached love (or words to that effect) and I cheered from the shower!
Of the personal stories I have read so far in the book, many contributors came to a point in their lives where they realised that they had to go to scripture to see what it actually said rather than listening to what others said about the role of women! Whereas, I. Howard Marshall said; "my experience of working with godly women in ministry, teaching, and leadership has been ample confirmation that to exclude them from these roles is indefensible". Women need men like I. Howard Marshall so that we can become the people God called us to be!
Tuesday, 8 March 2011
books
I was never into books as a child; life was far more exciting - climbing trees and playing cowboys and indians in the woodland at the bottom of our road with the two boys who lived a few houses away from mine!
And so it wasn't until I was in my thirties that I started reading books, especially non-fiction when I trained to be a counsellor. But I was also encouraged to read novels by one of our lodgers. I think I jumped in at the deep end by starting with John Fowles' 'The Magus'!
When I felt called to the ministry I started devouring books and so my collection of books grew to a wall full and that was just in my study! There were full bookcases all over our house.
When we were preparing for our move to Wales, we thought we would be down-sizing and took many books to a second-hand book shop in Brighton, who bought many of them because they had beautiful covers - it didn't seem to matter what was on the inside! What we didn't sell we took to the local charity book shop and the theological ones - several boxes full, went to the church we were leaving.
Having been in Wales a couple of years we found a house just as large and having been called to be minister, the bookcases have been filled once again! But I was aware that my breadth of reading was not very wide and to encourage myself, and meet and get to know more folk in the village, I joined the book club.
Yesterday we discussed our latest read of 'Shutter Island', which has been made into a film, starring Leonardo DiCaprio which some of our group had also seen this week on TV. Apparently, if you have not read the book the film is difficult to follow, but it is quite true to the original story.
We had an interesting discussion about mental health, especially as one of our group had worked in a psychiatric hospital.
Our next read is 'The Clan of the Cave Bear', which some of the group read many years ago but seems to be one of those books that can be re-read.
We are having a holiday shortly so that will be my holiday read!
And so it wasn't until I was in my thirties that I started reading books, especially non-fiction when I trained to be a counsellor. But I was also encouraged to read novels by one of our lodgers. I think I jumped in at the deep end by starting with John Fowles' 'The Magus'!
When I felt called to the ministry I started devouring books and so my collection of books grew to a wall full and that was just in my study! There were full bookcases all over our house.
When we were preparing for our move to Wales, we thought we would be down-sizing and took many books to a second-hand book shop in Brighton, who bought many of them because they had beautiful covers - it didn't seem to matter what was on the inside! What we didn't sell we took to the local charity book shop and the theological ones - several boxes full, went to the church we were leaving.
Having been in Wales a couple of years we found a house just as large and having been called to be minister, the bookcases have been filled once again! But I was aware that my breadth of reading was not very wide and to encourage myself, and meet and get to know more folk in the village, I joined the book club.
Yesterday we discussed our latest read of 'Shutter Island', which has been made into a film, starring Leonardo DiCaprio which some of our group had also seen this week on TV. Apparently, if you have not read the book the film is difficult to follow, but it is quite true to the original story.
We had an interesting discussion about mental health, especially as one of our group had worked in a psychiatric hospital.
Our next read is 'The Clan of the Cave Bear', which some of the group read many years ago but seems to be one of those books that can be re-read.
We are having a holiday shortly so that will be my holiday read!
Sunday, 6 March 2011
birthdays
We talk about milestone birthdays and think of 18, 30,40, 50 etc. but for me other birthdays have been important. I'm old enough to have had a 21st celebration, before 18 was the coming of age. But 35 hit me hard - I had had half of my three score years and ten which felt quite scary! But this year it is worse!
I was 20, when 'Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band' was released, working for C&As in their head office in Oxford Street and wearing very short skirts! it was the age of the mini-skirt and in '67 they were still getting shorter!
And so as I approached my birthday this year the words of one of the tracks kept going around my head. And yes, he is very handy mending a fuse and I often sit by the fireside knitting a sweater or two. We don't go to the Isle of Wight for our holidays, but I can be found with grandchildren on my knee. And if you are very confused you can look up the lyrics of 'When I'm 64'!
At twenty, sixty-four seemed very old, but now I have got here it is so different. I still feel twenty-five inside and when I'm with certain friends I can behave much younger. But I do like to remember my age, so at fifty I stopped wearing knee length skirts and at sixty, stopped wearing jeans. However, this does make buying suitable clothes quite difficult as I still like to look my best and not old and dowdy.
If fashion trends go the way they should, with the lack of money in people's purses, skirt lengths should drop and I will be happy!
I was 20, when 'Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band' was released, working for C&As in their head office in Oxford Street and wearing very short skirts! it was the age of the mini-skirt and in '67 they were still getting shorter!
And so as I approached my birthday this year the words of one of the tracks kept going around my head. And yes, he is very handy mending a fuse and I often sit by the fireside knitting a sweater or two. We don't go to the Isle of Wight for our holidays, but I can be found with grandchildren on my knee. And if you are very confused you can look up the lyrics of 'When I'm 64'!
At twenty, sixty-four seemed very old, but now I have got here it is so different. I still feel twenty-five inside and when I'm with certain friends I can behave much younger. But I do like to remember my age, so at fifty I stopped wearing knee length skirts and at sixty, stopped wearing jeans. However, this does make buying suitable clothes quite difficult as I still like to look my best and not old and dowdy.
If fashion trends go the way they should, with the lack of money in people's purses, skirt lengths should drop and I will be happy!
Thursday, 24 February 2011
celebration
It took several months in the planning and much excitement as the daughters of very old (time - not too much age!) and dear friends of mine, arranged a surprise 'party' for their parents' Ruby (40 years) Wedding Anniversary.
There was to be a church service with tea and cakes afterwards with everyone from the church invited - he is the church secretary and she heads up the pastoral team. And although his address was deleted from the email, hers wasn't - so they knew that something was happening.
What they didn't know when they arrived at the church, decorated with red balloons, was that their two bridesmaids and best man would be in the congregation, all wearing something red.
Old photographs had been obtained from Aunts and Uncles and I found one of us all at the Young People's Fellowship Easter Retreat back in 1965, which was duly scanned and shown to all. Photos included her as a fairy aged about eight, as a new parents, and with a very fashionable eighties perm - yuk!
We sang 'Now thank we all our God' which was sung at their wedding, and because he complained that they never sang what he thought was the most applicable hymn way back then, this time we did sing 'Fight the fight'! He has a very cheeky sense of humour!
So although they knew something had been arranged at the church in the afternoon, they were totally unaware of a planned meal out at one of their favourite restaurants with about thirty of their friends in the evening.
I added a day to my stay and was able to enjoy a morning with my friend of 48 years and it was just like being teenagers again!
May they have many more happy years together.
There was to be a church service with tea and cakes afterwards with everyone from the church invited - he is the church secretary and she heads up the pastoral team. And although his address was deleted from the email, hers wasn't - so they knew that something was happening.
What they didn't know when they arrived at the church, decorated with red balloons, was that their two bridesmaids and best man would be in the congregation, all wearing something red.
Old photographs had been obtained from Aunts and Uncles and I found one of us all at the Young People's Fellowship Easter Retreat back in 1965, which was duly scanned and shown to all. Photos included her as a fairy aged about eight, as a new parents, and with a very fashionable eighties perm - yuk!
We sang 'Now thank we all our God' which was sung at their wedding, and because he complained that they never sang what he thought was the most applicable hymn way back then, this time we did sing 'Fight the fight'! He has a very cheeky sense of humour!
So although they knew something had been arranged at the church in the afternoon, they were totally unaware of a planned meal out at one of their favourite restaurants with about thirty of their friends in the evening.
I added a day to my stay and was able to enjoy a morning with my friend of 48 years and it was just like being teenagers again!
May they have many more happy years together.
Friday, 18 February 2011
way back when...
I was a young housewife and cheese cost three shillings a pound - yes 15p! And my weekly shop cost me five pounds for the two of us, I quickly discovered that the products I saw advertised cost a lot more than those which were not and deduced that I was paying for the advertising as well as the product. So I have never bought the washing up liquid that would make my hands as soft as my face, especially as I have to wear rubber gloves anyway!
And now I see that we are soon to have 'product placing' in our television shows as well as in the breaks. As many of the programs I like are broadcast after I start to get ready for bed, most of the programs I watch are recorded and so I can fast forward the adverts. And it is because of people like me, who don't watch the adverts, that have forced the advertisers to fight for product placement. So I apologise to the 'powers that be' for not watching the adverts but I am so cynical I wouldn't buy the product anyway!
And now I see that we are soon to have 'product placing' in our television shows as well as in the breaks. As many of the programs I like are broadcast after I start to get ready for bed, most of the programs I watch are recorded and so I can fast forward the adverts. And it is because of people like me, who don't watch the adverts, that have forced the advertisers to fight for product placement. So I apologise to the 'powers that be' for not watching the adverts but I am so cynical I wouldn't buy the product anyway!
Tuesday, 15 February 2011
mandie
Following on from my last post, my exciting news is that Mandie's boyfriend of the last nine years proposed to her last Saturday, complete with ring!
This was not exactly new news as they had both talked to me about getting married at sometime in the future and as they both came from what is referred to as broken homes, they wanted to both feel stable before they signed on the dotted line. And for Mandie, that meant tracing her biological mother.
As my business before going to Spurgeon's college was making wedding dresses, Mandie grew up surrounded by silk, satin, tulle (fine net) and lots of twinkly beads, and at thirty she has waited a long time for her dream dress!
Well that is my news but I'm going to write more about Mandie, so if you wish to know about the trials and tribulations of adoption - read on.
Back in the 1960s, the hot topic was the population explosion, like climate control is today. So before we married we agreed that we would have two children to replace ourselves and then foster and adopt as the fancy took us. Having had two boys, I was still feeling broody and so I fostered new born babies until they were adopted and we also fostered a toddler. As the boys were growing up we wanted to permanently expand our family and so we looked to adopt. By then I had lost the broody feeling so we were quite happy to have an older child but I did want a girl. The boys were ten and nine when Mandie, aged two, came to live with us. It had taken us two years to go through the adoptive process, with lots of interviews and police checks.
As I was often seen around town with different babies, wheeling Mandie around was not unusual but as folk asked about her, I explained that Mandie was adopted, so she grew up with that knowledge.
Her brothers were very good with her and even as teenagers they allowed her into their rooms when their friends were around. When one friend told her that she didn't look like either of her brothers she very proudly told them, "Well of course not, I'm adopted!"
But I found her extremely difficult. Looking back with that wonderful gift of hindsight and a counselling training, I think that she was trying to see how naughty she had to be before this mother would give her away. In recent years we have discussed this and she agrees!
I felt that I had to give Mandie firm boundaries but I just became the bad cop while her Dad became the good cop. And eventually, the gulf between my husband and I became so wide that we separated. Circumstances meant that I did leave her and she stayed with her Dad. But she would often visit me and we started to be able to enjoy each other's company.
From very few GCSEs she has worked her way from being a shop assistant to being an assistant manager in a high street bank and has even been head-hunted within the bank to work at one of their large flagship branches.
Back in her early twenties she started to investigate her background, especially as she was haunted by the knowledge that she had a younger half-brother, but she realized that she wasn't ready. But eighteen months ago she started the journey again and has now met up with her natural mother, the half-brother she knew about and two others. She was welcomed by them all as all the brothers knew that they had an older sister, her Mum had baby photos of them all. Being welcomed by your natural family is very unusual, but Mandie was nearly two when she was given for adoption and I always wondered if at a later date her natural mother regretted it.
Life is full of 'what ifs'!
Mandie's family has grown as she now has two Mums, two adoptive brothers and three half-brothers but still only one Dad as she has no urge to find her biological father.
Mandie and I are now firm friends which is wonderful after all that we have been through, for which I can only give the Lord thanks.
This was not exactly new news as they had both talked to me about getting married at sometime in the future and as they both came from what is referred to as broken homes, they wanted to both feel stable before they signed on the dotted line. And for Mandie, that meant tracing her biological mother.
As my business before going to Spurgeon's college was making wedding dresses, Mandie grew up surrounded by silk, satin, tulle (fine net) and lots of twinkly beads, and at thirty she has waited a long time for her dream dress!
Well that is my news but I'm going to write more about Mandie, so if you wish to know about the trials and tribulations of adoption - read on.
Back in the 1960s, the hot topic was the population explosion, like climate control is today. So before we married we agreed that we would have two children to replace ourselves and then foster and adopt as the fancy took us. Having had two boys, I was still feeling broody and so I fostered new born babies until they were adopted and we also fostered a toddler. As the boys were growing up we wanted to permanently expand our family and so we looked to adopt. By then I had lost the broody feeling so we were quite happy to have an older child but I did want a girl. The boys were ten and nine when Mandie, aged two, came to live with us. It had taken us two years to go through the adoptive process, with lots of interviews and police checks.
As I was often seen around town with different babies, wheeling Mandie around was not unusual but as folk asked about her, I explained that Mandie was adopted, so she grew up with that knowledge.
Her brothers were very good with her and even as teenagers they allowed her into their rooms when their friends were around. When one friend told her that she didn't look like either of her brothers she very proudly told them, "Well of course not, I'm adopted!"
But I found her extremely difficult. Looking back with that wonderful gift of hindsight and a counselling training, I think that she was trying to see how naughty she had to be before this mother would give her away. In recent years we have discussed this and she agrees!
I felt that I had to give Mandie firm boundaries but I just became the bad cop while her Dad became the good cop. And eventually, the gulf between my husband and I became so wide that we separated. Circumstances meant that I did leave her and she stayed with her Dad. But she would often visit me and we started to be able to enjoy each other's company.
From very few GCSEs she has worked her way from being a shop assistant to being an assistant manager in a high street bank and has even been head-hunted within the bank to work at one of their large flagship branches.
Back in her early twenties she started to investigate her background, especially as she was haunted by the knowledge that she had a younger half-brother, but she realized that she wasn't ready. But eighteen months ago she started the journey again and has now met up with her natural mother, the half-brother she knew about and two others. She was welcomed by them all as all the brothers knew that they had an older sister, her Mum had baby photos of them all. Being welcomed by your natural family is very unusual, but Mandie was nearly two when she was given for adoption and I always wondered if at a later date her natural mother regretted it.
Life is full of 'what ifs'!
Mandie's family has grown as she now has two Mums, two adoptive brothers and three half-brothers but still only one Dad as she has no urge to find her biological father.
Mandie and I are now firm friends which is wonderful after all that we have been through, for which I can only give the Lord thanks.
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